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The Cabin => Poetry => Topic started by: dragonwyst on

Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: dragonwyst on
I would weave words wistfully with windingVines that verify veracities and view vistas worth Finding, freely flying,  far-flung,  fear-free and fineBeyond  basic borders binding bodies below.

 Garden Collection Grass Did you know     that         silver silky hairs             march the length                   of a blade of grass         pacing out the paths             of the parallel                    veins?   If every blade of grass      were a miniature spearwhat a war the world      would wage against us!    Autumn willow    wind-whispering         willow wands               weeping with winterness crying leaves. Autumn Leaves Rustling, rusty, rashlyswirling, swaying, swiftlygliding, glowing, gladlyfainting, falling, frayedlycrunching, crushing, crisplycrazy-colouredAutumn leaves. Marigold Merry, gold   marigold       merrily           growing goldLiving gold   dying gold      captivating         sun-goldBudding gold   growing old      marigolden         merry gold.  Moss mossgreenmosssoftmossmoistminiature   grassgreen      fieldforfaeriefair         forfaeriefun.
Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: cheeky~k8 on
I think the effect of how you\'ve made it look like a wave, looks very appealing to read.Its a good poem too.
Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: Chris on
Autumn willow   wind-whispering        willow wands              weeping with winterness[/quote] Bravo! This is a beautiful piece, full of rich imagery, colour and vision.
Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: SpaceMonkey on
I think the Marigold one is my favorite.  It is very clever. I like playing with assonance and alliteration too, but I\'ve not dedicated a whole piece or collection to the idea, you make me want to.  The way you wrote the last one Moss made it look like the fairies sneaked in to your computer after you were done with the rest of them and typed it in themselves.  Tee hee that was brilliant!! 
Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: HomesickAlienPoet on
You are tackling a technique near and dear to my hear, and you have done it masterfully.  There are some very clever lines in this collection as well.  My personal favorite is:If every blade of grass       were a miniature spear what a war the world       would wage against us!



My only advice would be that these devices and techniques are often at their best when employed with subtly.  However, such advice would be moot in this piece when the very point is extravagance with the employment of the technique.  So bravo!  I enjoyed this collection a great deal.  Also, the implication of movement implied by the forms in your garden collection added an extra layer of effectiveness that heightened the overall effect. 
Title: Playing with Alliteration and Assonance
Post by: liam on
pacing out the paths             of the parallel                   veins?[/quote]I like these lines the most, well done and thanks for sharing.